Thursday, 28 February 2013

Happy March

HEY YALL
I just came back from jogging so i look like that right now hahaha. I havent been jogging for AGES seriously..i think the last time was 3-4 months back! This time round i brought my dog along with me, its our first jog together!
I dont know why but it seemed as though she was pulling me down and i was dragging her along lol...hopefully its because the leash is uncomfortable or er,she was thirsty? If not there must be something wrong with her cause i jog damn slowly leh.

Face redder than an apple


Its around 33 days to my audition day. Yes,i'm auditioning for Royal Welsh Conservatory, located in the UK on the 3rd of April.
Many thoughts have been running through my mind.

1. I cannot stop thinking about how i'm going to leave all my friends in singapore, my boyfriend, my parents and just everything that i own here...FOR 5 YEARS (because i want a master degree as well).
Its definitely not my first overseas trip, i'm perfectly fine with travelling but 5 years is seriously way too long.

2. Before i go to bed, i'll think about how i'll only have ang mor friends since only 7% of their students are foreigners...and how there will be no more racist jokes, no more people to mock my chinese, no more hokkien, NO MORE BUBBLE TEA OMFG<<< CANNOT LIVE WITHOUT THIS. no more lah leh lor hor and other singlish words...

3. Another concern would be my dog. I was thinking of bringing her over there with me but seriously...i'll be in school, then i'll have to practice. What makes me think that i'll still have the time to take care of her, bring her out for walks and give her all the love and attention i've been giving right now? And bringing a dog overseas has many procedures as well zzz. And then renting an apartment, i'll have to make sure they allow pets if not i'll have to find another place to stay!? I DONT EVEN KNOW IF I CAN FIND A PLACE TO STAY.

4. I'll also have to get a bank loan since i dont want to depend on my parents. The standard of living in the UK is DEFINITELY super expensive. I'll come back to singapore having to pay off debts, not enjoying life lol. But this is definitely a small concern for now.

5. I've done my calculations. Boyfriend in army right now + me overseas for a few years definitely has a slim chance of working out. Its making me super stressed...he's in guards unit, does anyone know how tough their training is?!! They dont get to book out every weekday for the next 2 years unlike a few other units. I can't even webcam with him and even if i do webcam with him over the weekends, he'll have other plans installed for him as well. Just how the hell is the relationship going to survive?
Even if we do make it through army + me overseas, then what about afterwards? When he's in uni + me overseas... He'll meet new people as well. There's always a saying that people find their other half in uni right. So like the chances of working out is 0.00000001% hah...

6. I could stay in singapore and study in YST but i have to wait till next year in around march to audition for their september 2014 intake but as most people know, its DAMN hard to get into YST because they're flooded with china people who practice like crazy over the past FEW YEARS. So what makes me think i can get in. What if i do not manage to get in? Their audition criteria is damn hardcore. Then i would have wasted 1 year for nothing? Then what...audition for royal welsh again?
7. I could also stay in singapore to go to a local uni. I've been thinking about this for super long already and i thought of studying business. I'm damn interested in online business but yes i dont think that requires a degree. I'm also afraid i'll regret not further studying my music. BUT this is like the safest route. I get to keep everything that i have + its some sort of an interest that i have as well.

I really don't know what i should do. People like tong lin and my boyfriend asked me to go to royal welsh, people like grace told me to try out for YST next year. As for myself, i'm just plain confused.
This 1 decision could affect my life so much, i dont even know how i am to choose. My parents are fine with the music path but not the business one.

Sigh, anyway i've been getting back on track with my piano practicing already and its going pretty well i think. There's too much stress since i have so little time left before my audition.sigh.


Anyway, should i change my hairstyle to fringe-less? Pretty sick of my side fringe already
Random photos from the other day before going to bed





Aiya i dont know what to do. Feeling so damn vexed now.
Shall just have my shower and go to bed because i have my piano lesson tomorrow at 8am lol oh noz.

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